Confidential · Strategy track · Q4 ascent
Yagya Ghiya
MSc Medical Genetics, University of Glasgow. Can run an NGS library prep in her sleep - and frequently has. Currently plotting a measured ascent into life sciences strategy consulting, where the pipettes are metaphorical and the impact is scalable.
Hobbies & interests
Encrypted office gossip
Intermediate Russian and German, maintained almost exclusively for commentary that the rest of the room cannot decrypt. Conjugation is occasionally sacrificed for speed; the verdict on a colleague is never lost.
Professional dodging
Advanced field navigation of toxic startup office politics: the silent unmute, the calendar Tetris, the strategic absence. Survives the blast radius of every reorg without leaving a forwarding address.
The grand escape
An ongoing, meticulously project-managed departure from lab benchwork. Gantt chart exists. Stakeholders unaware. Timeline aggressive but defensible. Risk register reads simply: "the bench finds out."
Skills
Bench science
NGS library preps, qPCR, the gel that never quite runs straight. Hands remember everything the calendar would like to forget. Will deny muscle memory under oath, then pipette a flawless serial dilution.
Corporate survival
Thriving on a balanced diet of spite and strategy. Reads a room, a roadmap, and a passive-aggressive Slack thread with equal fluency. Currently the only renewable energy source in the building.
Languages I use to escape conversations
Toxic startup office politics: a survival guide
Battle-tested in open-plan environments with free kombucha and no boundaries. Results may vary; your runway may not.
Announce it at minute one, not minute fifty-nine. A hard stop declared early is a boundary; declared late it is a confession. There need not be a meeting after. There need not be anything after. The hard stop is the schedule.
Open three documents named after last quarter's strategy, frown at a Gantt chart you did not build, and reply "circling back on this" to a thread that no longer has stakeholders. Motion is not progress, but in week one of a pivot, nobody is checking.
The snitch reacts 👀 to mild venting, then says nothing, then it reaches leadership lightly editorialized. Watch who emoji-reacts in public and DMs in private. The Venn diagram is a single circle, and you already know its name.
When the all-hands is moved earlier and the agenda is "TBD," update your résumé before you update your standup. Optimism is a luxury good; secure yours first.
"Happy to own this if it's the highest-leverage use of my time" is a complete sentence. It sounds like a yes. It is load-bearing scaffolding for a no.
Read it. Do not reply. Reply at 9:14am with "great thread - let's align live." By 9:14am the vision has changed. It always has. You have now saved an evening and aligned with the future.
Currently accepting introductions to strategy teams, decent espresso, and exit interviews.